aita?

[insertusername]

am i the asshole?

Life isn’t always black and white. Sometimes it’s hard to tell who’s really at fault, and no one wants to believe they’re the bad guy. Sometimes you need an outside opinion. Or several.

Tell your side of the story and crowdsource an honest answer to the age old question; Am I The Asshole?

Top Level

with your character explaining a situation where they might have been the asshole.

Comment

with your hot takes. Anon or IC.

Comments

lys skovgaard | original | ota

[pawper]

I don't tell people the truth if I think it's just gonna hurt them.

[secare]

Sounds like a slippery slope.

[pawper]

I guess...

[Hesitant, unsure. It seems like an obvious choice to her: who wouldn't want to avoid unnecessary pain? But here this kid was, challenging that assumption.]

I mean, yeah, it'd be one thing if I knew they were sick before they did, or something. Not saying anything would be totally wrong and just end up hurting them more.

[A sidelong glance, looking at his face without actually meeting his eyes.]

But if I knew...other stuff...why would anyone even want to hear it?

i'm missing a lot of icons

[secare]

Do you really think that it's okay for you to make that decision?

( tapping a finger against his chin as he thinks about it. )

I guess it really depends on the thing, but sometimes it's better to know the truth. Even if it hurts.

shame on u

[pawper]

[A flinch, because she's just that cowardly. Being sneaky and underhanded was always easier than taking the risk of opening herself up to scorn and anger, but simply admitting that to herself didn't take the guilt away.]

I don't know. [...] I just don't want them to be hurt. And if a decision has to be made anyway...

[A sigh.]

...sometimes it's better, huh?

[secare]

Yea. You gotta trust them to be able to handle it.

( he knows. he frequently wants to be told things that he isn't for the sake of "his own good". somehow, it never actually is. )

You'd want the same thing yourself, wouldn't you?

[pawper]

[She doesn't answer for a long time, hating the way that question seems to writhe inside her chest like a living thing. She feels like a fish on a hook, yanked out of her element and left gasping for air. So she stops trying to look at him at all, turning her face away.]

...I don't know if I would. What's the point of sharing something ugly and painful that you can't do anything about? It's like...like you're hitting someone without actually touching them.

[She thinks about Anja, who told her all the time how stupid and worthless she was. How it was always the truth, always correct—because Anja was so much smarter and braver and better, and that meant she was always right.]

[dreamofrain]

[ Just a long, understanding sigh. ]

You are not an "asshole" for that, Lys. But it's not exactly a good habit to keep up, either.

[pawper]

[She's sprawled out on her back, arms folded behind her head, face tilted away to study the paint on the far wall. The sigh makes her brows crease in a frown that deepens with every word 6O says.]

Why? It's always worked before.

[dreamofrain]

... Does it, though?

[ She can't keep the doubt out of her tone. "Working" was doing a lot of heavy lifting there. Perhaps it was effective in avoiding situations, but it never actually settled matters. She knew that Lys knew that, too. ]

[pawper]

Sure it does.

[The doubt in 6O's voice is about as subtle as police sirens, but there's no law that says Lys has to acknowledge it. So she doesn't, continuing to stare at the wall in pretended nonchalance. Ignoring. Dismissing.]

People can't worry about what they don't know about. They don't get sad or scared or angry. They're happy, or least they don't feel any worse than before...and isn't that enough?

[dreamofrain]

But how long can that really last? It feels like only a temporary solution, one that doesn't really ever address what's could actually cause the hurt in the first place...

[ 6O sat herself beside Lys, but didn't do anything to try and force her attention on the discussion. Right now, this was a discussion of words... best to leave it at that, for the moment. ]

It's a stopgap. It's not progressive.

[hairrowing]

Honesty isn't always the best virtue.

[pawper]

Yeah, that's how I feel about it.

[And yet SOME people!! Seem to think otherwise!]

It'd be nice if it was, but it just isn't. Not in my experience, anyway.

[hairrowing]

No, it isn't in my experience either. I'd say it's unrealistic.

[pawper]

Unrealistic, yeah.

[A nod that comes easily, colored by an obvious relief. At least here’s someone that seemed to understand.]

I don’t think they really know what they’re asking for. They’d get sick of anyone that was totally honest with them all the time.

[hairrowing]

They'd get mad-- people think they want to hear the truth, but they just want to hear what they want to hear.

[goen]

I accidentally dropped Yukine's soap into the toilet last night and didn't tell him.

[ whose thread is this ]

[pawper]

[i will pay you 5 yen to never sweat in my presence again]

Did you wash it off before putting it back?

[goen]

Of course! I ran it under some water. It's soap, so it's clean no matter what! But if I told him about it, he'd just get mad, see?

[ So he's on your side, Lys! ☆ ]

[secare]

I'm right here.

( you dumb bastard. )

[goen]

[ SWEAT GLANDS ARE ENGAGED ]

What's that? You want your master's attention? I understand, but we should really focus on Lys...

[lets_wink_brothers]

Is that bad or good?

[pawper]

Maybe not "good" so much as....necessary? I don't think it's bad, either, but some people do.

[The shrug she gives makes it clear what she thinks about that.]

[lets_wink_brothers]

So it's 'complicated'?