unpopular opinions

[insertusername]

unpopular opinions

Do you think people are too sensitive? Or that Superman isn't so super? Think cats aren't cute? The Beatles are overrated? Love pineapple on pizza? Maybe you just don't like chips rly. Even the best of us have some controversial opinions. Let people know what a monster you are.

top level

with your characters’ unpopular and/or controversial opinion. Or share few of them at once. In person or via text. Prepare for disagreement.

comment

to tell them why they're wrong, validate a kindred spirit, or just troll them for caring about such a silly-ass thing in the first place.

Comments

[skeddie]

What the fuck? I'm gonna need you to cite your sources. And from somewhere reputable, I don't trust random crazy uncles who you only see once a year at Thanksgiving.

[horticulturalist]

Mouthy for a little guy, huh?

[Shrugs.] I don't know if it's true. Just something a girl I know told me. She's weird, but. The kind of weird that might actually know random facts about spiders... So take it or leave it.

[skeddie]

My height and build are perfectly average for my age, thank you.

[no, he's tiny, but an intrigued tiny]

Can you describe the variety of weird? Like, what other kind of stuff has she said?

[horticulturalist]

What age is that exactly?

That would depend on which one of her you're talking to. Sometimes it's all psychobabble. Sometimes it's like listening to a Dickens novel on tape. Sometimes it's mostly cussing.

[skeddie]

12. [a skeptical squint waiting to see what kind of remarks come from revealing his age]

I wanna meet the cussing one!

[horticulturalist]

I don't think I knew the word fuck when I was 12... Or maybe I did, but I sure as hell didn't have the balls to say it.

She's not as fun as she sounds. Hits people a lot.

[skeddie]

Not my fault you weren't cool. [Eddie then leans in as if promising to keep a secret safe and lowers his voice almost to a whisper.] You can say those words now, right? Without getting in trouble with your mom or anything?

[horticulturalist]

Yeaaah, that one's on me.

Fuck yes I can. Though, at a certain point you'll start wishing there was something worse to say.

[skeddie]

Duh, that one's easy. You just string 'em together like, "What's up, dicknuts? I heard you sharted your pants so hard that they blew up bigger than your mom's asshole."

Like that!

[See? He's helping.]

[horticulturalist]

I take it back, you'd like my friend Jane.

You're clearly better suited for this than I am, but I have to say that all seems a little wordy for my taste.

[skeddie]

That's why you gotta talk fast! Tongue twisters help, but the Peter Piper one is for babies.

[horticulturalist]

Is someone watching your sugar intake?

[skeddie]

My mom does most of the time but I know how to sneak in candy when she's not around.

[horticulturalist]

You don't say...

You know, too much sugar will stunt your growth.

[skeddie]

That is not true.

[Eddie folds his arms across his chest.]

Every time you tell me a fact I'm going to need to know where you got it from. I know fish stories when I hear 'em.

[horticulturalist]

Don't take my word for it. That one comes from top military brass. I was a specialist in the Air Force. Prepped for space flight. They gave us all kinds of supplements to keep their test pilots in tip top shape. No sugar allowed.

[He shrugs innocently. It worked on his boys once upon a time.]

[skeddie]

No way! Did you get to go to space? Can you fly a plane really fast and upside down without throwing up? Did they also change your diet to make sure you didn't get sick? I bet there was a lot of oranges.

[horticulturalist]

I did. And I can. And a lot more raw protein actually. It's pretty bland to be honest.

[skeddie]

You'd better not be eating raw meat! Do you know what kind of bacteria could be in the uncooked shit? You're gonna get a tapeworm, dude.

[horticulturalist]

I meant more like... refined protein powders and the like.
But an intestinal parasite wouldn't have been the worst thing they left with me.

[skeddie]

Sorry you got worse than a tapeworm. You seem cool.

[horticulturalist]

Yeah?
Well. Thanks. It is what it is. I'm not going to say it wasn't wholly undeserved.

What about you? What do you want to do when you're older.
Aside from cuss without earning your mother's ire.

[skeddie]

Yeah. A lot of adults either ignore me or think I'm some kinda baby. But you talk like a person who's actually seen other human beings before.

I wanna be a doctor. I think I'd be good at it. I know a lot about germs and shit that could kill you. And one time I stitched up a friend's cut with my first aid kit.

[horticulturalist]

Heh. There's an irony to that that's just rich.
But I think maybe a lot of people forget how much they knew already, when they were a kid.

Yeah? Was it gross? I bet it was gross.

[skeddie]

How's it ironic?

It was super gross but I'm not afraid of blood. I was more pissed off than anything. This dipshit bully from school cut Ben in the stomach for pretty much no reason.